Kickass queen of the internet Jackie Weaver solves Katie Price, Kim Kardashian and Boris Johnson’s lockdown problems

VIRAL queen Jackie Weaver has shown us she can certainly keep her cool in the face of adversity. 

Chaos erupted after Council Chairman Brian Tolver told Clerk Jackie Weaver that she had “no authority" to hold a Zoom meeting – prompting her to throw him off the call. 

Jackie told The Sun her calm demeanor is thanks to training as a counsellor three years ago. 

She said: “If you want to please people you have to listen to what they want. I guess that makes me quite a good listener. 

“When somebody is angry – whether that’s at me or just angry – I guess I’m trying to look behind what I’m seeing. I’m not reacting angrily because I’m busy.” 

Now no-nonsense Jackie has stepped in to give her advice on what we think some very special readers might need help with. 

From Boris Johnston to Kim Kardashian, JACKIE WEAVER dishes out some home truths and wise words. 

'Everyone says I look scruffy'

DEAR JACKIE: No matter what I do with my hair everyone says I look scruffy. What can I do? Boris J, Westminster

JACKIE SAYS:  It’s been hard for everyone not having access to hairdressers and beauticians during the pandemic.

As soon as lockdown is over, you must take some professional advice. 

You do not want to be caught out like I was in a recent Parish Council Zoom where the whole world can see you have not done your hair. 

Some say they love you for you but I disagree. Get a haircut. 

'How do I show I have the authority?'

DEAR JACKIE: I’ve cut ties with my family but still want to benefit from their family business. How do I show them I have the authority? Harry W, Montecito, California

JACKIE SAYS: These are difficult times for all of us and now more than ever we need to reach out to family. 

Do go round to Walmart immediately, buy a pair of knee pads, strap them on and go crawling back. You won’t regret it. 

If you can’t apologise then your only option is to lie. 

Tell your family that you’ve had a complete breakdown, you don’t know what you are doing and now you you need money to help you cope as the trauma of having been separated from your family has left you unable to work. 

Oh and family always like to feel they are taking care of each other.

So as well as cash ask them to send some non-vegan food – you know it’ll make you feel better. 

'I'm banned from Twitter'

DEAR JACKIE: I got a bit carried away on Twitter and now I’m banned. Help! Don T, Mar-a-Lago, Florida

JACKIE SAYS: I am sorry I have nothing positive to offer. 

When you’re wrong, you’re wrong. 

Sometimes you just have to accept that when you’re banned – you’re banned . 

'I'm on hubby number four'

DEAR JACKIE: I’m about to get married but this is hubby number four. How many is too many? Katie P, Essex

JACKIE SAYS: Whilst it’s fabulous to think of looking forward to a wedding post lockdown,  I want to encourage you to take a little time and explore the inner strength that I know you have. 

You don’t need another man. Leave one for us. 

'What do I do after sacking?'

DEAR JACKIE: I’ve been sacked after 18 months in the job. To be honest it wasn’t going well. But what do I do now? Frank L, Stamford Bridge 

JACKIE SAYS: It can be so painful feeling unwanted and not needed. 

However, now that you have some free time why not consider getting involved with your local council and help to make a difference in your local community?

Check out the #MakeAChange campaign from the National Association of Local Councils (NALC).

'I broke the rules'

DEAR JACKIE: I’ve broken the lockdown rules and now everyone is so angry at me. How can I redeem myself? Rita O, north London… and Chelsea… and Egypt

JACKIE SAYS: First of all, pay your fines promptly. The government needs the money. 

Then pay the fines of anyone else involved in lockdown – none of us have much cash.

And then, so you feel good about yourself again, donate hugely to your local food bank. 

And promise to not do it again – and try not to smile.

'My hubby is an ass'

DEAR JACKIE: I’m at the end of my tether with my husband. He keeps making an ass of himself. Do I give him the boot? Kim K, Calabasas, California

JACKIE SAYS: Oh dear. There comes a time when you have to look after yourself – painful as that might be. 

Gather your strength and make your way in this world as an independent woman. 

Remind yourself – he was holding you back. 

'Bro and suitor want to duel'

DEAREST JACKIE: My brother has challenged my very hunky suitor to a duel. How can I convince them to get along?  D. Bridgerton, The Ton

JACKIE SAYS: You and your brother are far too old to be arguing over toys. 

Ask a friend to help you – disarm both of them and banish them both to the drawing room to resolve their issues. 

Do not let them out until they are besties once again. 

'Older lover is my boss'

DEAR JACKIE: My new girlfriend is ten years older than me and is also my boss. Will love triumph? Harry S, Los Angeles 

JACKIE SAYS: I really hope so – I’m sending wishes that everything goes well for you.

However, it might be worth considering a general nursing course now so if problems like incontinence, lack of mobility, hair loss come up you are ready for them. 

Love does indeed conquer all. 

'Gossip has torn us apart'

DEAR JACKIE:  My friend accused me of gossiping about her and now we’ve fallen out. Should we kiss and make up? Becky V, Leicester

JACKIE SAYS: I think that’s a wonderful idea. 

If you do insist on kissing however please be mindful of Government guidelines on social distancing.

You may need to consider virtual hugs instead. 

The best way to settle an argument is to do so calmly and try to see the other’s point of view. 

Why not invite your friend for a (virtual) G&T and thrash things out?

Source: Read Full Article